Author: Stax

so it’s interesting…almost everyday i am made aware of a phrase/saying that is something only a Trini will understand.  I never realized that no-one else says “ole years”; i knew that Americans don’t, but i thought it was a Caribbean thing…come to find out just this weekend gone that maybe it’s a Trini thing?

Anyhoo, so a friend of mine is having a big lime (get together/party/any social gathering) for old years.  He lives in Raleigh and “D” is coming down to ATL to drive up to NC.  All of us were in Atlanta at some point years ago (Spelman and Morehouse days) and even tho we don’t see each other very often; we are still in touch and this lime promises to be a shitload of good/happy times. Well I’ve known about it for some time and then decided that i will go south instead of north for the occasion.  Suffice it to say that “D” is not happy about the fact that I’m not going (most probably because now he will have to drive up by himself).  He was cursing me out about it last week and it occurred to me that subconciously i’d prefer to in a social setting only if at least 1 of my “inner circle” is around.  Maybe it’s because I know that if something were to go wrong, they would have my back.  Now don’t get me wrong,  “D” is part of the “inner circle” but as i mentioned before, he did allow me to fall TWICE in a party 🙂

Okay…so my mother is an Executive Agent at Guardian Life BUT I really do think that insurance is 1 of the BIGGEST rip offs that any normal person has to deal with – and I’ve told her as such.  Now…don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that i have it but oye! the insurance companies don’t always make it easy for you. 

Anyhoo,  at the end of the 2007, i got a statement  of savings from the pharmacy i use; I call them every month to schedule a shipment of my “beloved” shots.  I won’t get into the cost of the MRI/Lumbar Puncture etc, but my medication cost upward of $16K (and that was 2 years ago).  My cost; roughly $300.  Actually, at the beginning of every year, i normally hold my breath around the delivery of the 1st shipment, because I fear that my monthly cost will increase.  Boy am I glad that i have the insurance!!!  What would my fate have been if i didn’t?  I know someone who doesn’t take any shots – i applaud her, but as much as i “look forward to taking them every day“,  I’m not brave enough to find out what would/could happen if i didn’t.

So…since being diagnosed i do have some fears.

• FALLING – this actually is one of my biggest fears; what if I fall and hurt myself; sometimes i am so stiff and have little balance – did I mention that i live in a 3 story townhouse?  I have to contend with 32 steps everyday!  When I do go into the office, I work downtown on Peachtree St.  For those of u who don’t know, Peachtree is the Frederick St of Atlanta.  i am so afraid of falling on Peachtree St, that i feel ill just thinking about it!

• Not being able to walk – probably a close 2nd.  I know that this is also not the end of the world, but it is what it is…
• Pain; I can’t say this enuf – I am LUCKY; these days i have no pain
• The unknown – the thing about MS is that it affects people differently.  At any given time, who knows what the disease may have in store for me
•  Falling and not being able to get up
• Holding babies – esp if I’m standing up; suppose i am holding 1 and i fall!
• Walking between cars in a parking lot; this probably is not so much a fear as something i dislike doing – esp when 1 of the cars is not mine…suppose i lose my balance and end up falling/leaning on 1 of the cars!
• Wearing heels…yes because u guessed it – i WILL break my ass (fall)

• Stay away from the babies – unless i’m sitting down
• Cross the street very carefully only at the crosswalk and ALWAYS wait for the light (no guarantee, but worth a shot)
• Wear slippers & sneakers almost everywhere i go; helps me to be sure footed