Goodbye Shurlan

I said goodbye to meh boy Shurlan yesterday. It still is all surreal to me; I still can’t quite wrap my head around the fact that he’s gone – completely gone. After attending a funeral last year, I made a conscious decision that I don’t want a funeral; it just too somber, too sad, too drawn out and I don’t want that to be everyone’s last memory of me. Well after attending Shurlan’s funeral I realised that they do not have to be sad and somber etc. and if I change my mind about having a funeral, his is what I want mine to be like. Remember that this is only my opinion now and if I sound harsh/heartless I apologise. In the church there were no reminders beyond the obvious (that we knew that we were there for his funeral) that we were there for a funeral. No casket, no pictures of him at the entrance of the church (pictures always get to me), no pictures of him in the program, no eulogy.  The priest who officiated knew him personally and so when he gave his sermon he punctuated it with actual stories/jokes etc. The only time we saw a slideshow of pictures of Shurlan was at the very end after the service in a hall next to the church where refreshments were being served…I really appreciated that… it made it a little less sad for me. Everyone was grieving of course because it was a sad occasion but there were no reminders everywhere we looked.

Today is Friday and I had plans of publishing this post this morning because I started it last night, but alas in the middle of typing it I got another call that someone else had died. At this point, i eh go lie I am so very tired of death it’s not funny. J’s mother died last night and he called me and I changed all my plans to ensure that I was available for him and his brothers for however they needed me. They are the little brothers (I’m the eldest…they are all my little brothers…regardless of size lol) that I never had. Steups

after the church service we went to Shurlan’s house. I don’t know how/when the Trini thing of drinks/lime/music/good times after someone’s death started but I’m sure that it is done so that just for those few hours, the family members and those left behind can forget about the sadness and reality of the situation and just have a good time.  We were “Jammin Still” as the “happiest people alive” throwing “Splinters” on the bottle and spoon with the iron man…it was a great send off. I eh go lie though, I got the most emotional when the bikers showed up. Shurlan was a member of a motorcycle club and when they all showed up, the music was cut and for 5/10 mins all they did was rev those bike engines…it really was too much to handle for a number of people who were there…just experiencing that brotherhood sigh!….Shurlan meh boy…ride hard, ride fast, ride in heaven where I know u are.

Thank you for indulging me for the past couple posts…I guess we’ll be back to ms next time because, of course, I have some things to talk about.